Firstly, I need a big cuddle. Just to make sure everything is real and I’m not going completley insane and my life is changing before my eyes. I mean, ah!

Two very important applications are sat on my desk just waiting to be filled in, one I HAVE to do TONIGHT. I’m applying for the world challenge. One of my deepest (yet concealed)  passions. Now it all comes out though. I am applying for this because I want to be challenged, I want to help others I wasnt to be in a team with the same drive as me and with the same passion as me. I want to know I’m not useless and I want to know that I am worth something.

My mother keep sasking me if I realise what it entails, of course I do, I’ve wanted to do it since year 7. I want to raise the money by myself, I want to face all the challenges ahead and I want to let  people know I CAN.

The second application form is my sixth form application. The next 2 years of my life depend on that peice of paper and what I write on it. I need to get a B in PHYSICS to do one of the subjects my heart is set on. So, no doubt, I’ll break down mentally due to over studying physics and then failing anyway because I’m a retard like that. So, my future is nigh and yet, I’mnot fazed by it, just, I have brain block today and I can’t think of how to word something so important.

I miss Jim. I really do. I ned him and his hugs and I don’t have them. How upsetting. I love him so much, it’s been a year and a weekish ^.^ yayyyy!

Anyway, I still  hate everyone who is younger than year 11. I hate trends, I hate everyone on Myspace except people who are genuine and I HATE school.

Please cheer me up. Anybody?